Magi Soul

What did I learn from the last ten years?

Not just when my dad kicked me out, but before that, when I graduated high school. After receiving help on occasion I made it to where I am now. I realized these lessons a few years ago and they still hold true today.

You have to make the choice to keep going. You have to. No matter how many people tell you that you have a chance to live a happy life, that you’re loved, that things get better, etc. You have to make the choice, everyday.

Living for others can start out helpful but will turn self debilitating. Eventually you will have to choose to live for yourself, for your own happiness. It can be hard, especially when certain people who you thought would be by your side forever aren’t anymore, but that’s ok. Some people are only in your life for a small period, to help you learn or experience something.

Trust your initial reactions, your intuition. While having a mental illness can make it harder, you need to trust yourself. You know yourself best, no matter what anyone says. There is always a reason you had that reaction. Trust it. Trust yourself.

Not everyone who says they’re there for you will be there when you need them. Do not take that personally. Everyone has their own lives, their own struggles. Some will purposefully ignore or overlook your needs, but some are just busy dealing with their own lives.

That’s why it’s important for you to be there for yourself first. Who will always be by your side? Who sees and experiences what you do, everyday? You do. That’s why it’s important to build a relationship with yourself, to get to know yourself. If you can be happy and content on your own, you will not be dependent on another person. Why? Because you know that you can meet all your needs. This doesn’t mean stay single forever or be distant with everyone you meet. It just means you will not define yourself by what you can do for others or your relationships.

Holding yourself accountable can be hard but rewarding. Doing that means accepting that you aren’t nearly as nice, honest, or amazing of a person as you would like to believe you are. That does not mean you call yourself names and have a pity-party. It means you make the effort to make the necessary changes to become a better person whenever possible. There are always opportunities so it will be a never-ending journey.