While I have listened to almost every single release, repeatedly, I have held back watching the music videos. Some might be upset that I decided to do that. My reasons for it are simple – at least for me they are – in that I am highly sensitive and was worried about being triggered during a time or in a setting where I wouldn’t be able to care for myself if I was (triggered). I knew that I needed to be prepared, needed to be in a state of being where I was overall safe, and where I would have the time to ‘deal with’ whatever reactions I would have.
Not to stray, but I was unprepared for the MBMIL music videos from BTS that triggered me due to how closely I related with what they showed (abuse, self harm, depression, etc.). So remembering that, I waited to watch and appreciate the visuals that the DPR team took such care to craft and showcase for Ian’s music and storyline based on his mental health journey and struggles. My own mental health is something I’ve been worried about and questioning for almost the entirety of 2025 so while I am unsure of how the music videos will impact me, I do want to finally see what The Other Side is about.
Back to June 13 when I initially watched the music video..
When the scene starts in the kitchen, Ian surfacing from the water. Choking on the water and clambering onto the counter top made my anxiety spike and I wanted to cry.
The moment he’s on the ground(1:43), smiling quite manically, I thought to myself “he’s fucking mad“. So fucking mad that I cackled to myself and still felt on the verge of tears. “This man looks as if he’s lost the plot…but was there ever one to begin with?”
Around 1:50 is the thumbnail, but while the eye ring might catch yours, the intense pleading in his caught mine. The imagery that appeared in my mind was a little boy pleading, asking for help, before turning into a trickster to tease you for falling for his act. After all, it’s in the eyebrows.
2:01, 11 seconds later, the smile came crawling back with a disposition that leaves you wondering if you should exit the music video and instead listen to the song while sitting in the sunlight. Sorry, that’s dramatic. Yet the serious undertone throughout the video thus far has me hesitating with each passing moment.
As I continue watching, the pressure on my chest from where he’s sitting is not getting any lighter. Back and forth, color to black & white, upright to disoriented swaying — a constant switch.
He’s in this forest, greenery a sharp contrast to the nothingness of Mito’s spinning canvas. 2:30, my mind goes to Tarzan for some reason. But would a Lost Boy from Peter Pan be more accurate?
All that keeps going through my head is “is he falling in love with his own madness? lost and in love, this one.” 3:14 If you keep the top spinning, it will never lose momentum and will always have purpose. (314 = you I love)
Never-ending spins will leave you distracted, disconnected, and dissociating. (3:44) But is it you or your surroundings that aren’t stable? (3:53) The anxiety in my chest is back, striking fast and moving up to grip my jaw and clench my teeth. An external weapon that’s supposedly dangerous — what is, a gun?
All I remember from when I watched this – these are notes I took while watching a few weeks ago – is the buzzy feeling just under my skin. It wasn’t hyper energy or anxiety, just… a buzzing. There’s no other way to explain it or describe it that is coming to mind. I do know that there is a storyline already established and talked about several times over by Ian. Yet I feel like I’m just starting this new, unknown, really intense story that you can’t finish until the characters say you can. The author says it’s over? Nah, you gotta wait for the characters to say goodbye… and I don’t believe Mito or Insanity will let that happen so easily. Next is, No Blueberries? I’ll update y’all after I’ve explored that chapter!
Magi Soul 
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